Help crafting their story
Sometimes families want to conduct the funeral service themselves or have someone close to them deliver the main tribute. But writing a eulogy during grief is incredibly difficult. The words don't come, or they come in fragments that don't quite connect. You know what you want to say but can't figure out how to shape it into something coherent and meaningful.
That's where I can help. I'll work with you to gather the memories, stories and details about your loved one, then craft them into a structured, heartfelt eulogy that you can deliver yourself or have someone else read on your behalf.
What's included
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Getting to know them
We meet (in person or by video) to talk about your loved one. I ask questions to help you remember and articulate what made them special – their character, their life story, the relationships that mattered, the moments that defined them.
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Planning questionnaire
I provide a guide to help you gather additional thoughts, memories and anecdotes. This ensures we don't miss anything important and gives you time to remember things between our meeting and the writing process.
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Eulogy writing
I take everything you've shared and craft it into a cohesive, moving tribute. The eulogy flows naturally, balancing the factual life story with personal insights and meaningful anecdotes. It's written in a tone that feels appropriate for your loved one – whether that's warm and humorous, quietly dignified, or anything in between.
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Your review
You receive the eulogy draft to read through. If anything needs adjusting or expanding, we revise together until you're completely happy with it.
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Delivery guidance (optional)
If you're planning to deliver the eulogy yourself and would like some tips on how to present it, I'm happy to offer guidance on pacing, breathing, and managing emotion during delivery.
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Final version
You receive a polished, formatted version of the eulogy ready to print or share.
How it works
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1. Initial conversation
You get in touch to let me know you need help with eulogy writing. We discuss timing, what you're looking for, and arrange our meeting.
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2. Gathering their story
We meet to talk about your loved one. I guide you through their life, asking questions that help draw out the meaningful details and memories. This conversation typically lasts about an hour.
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3. Additional memories
I send you a questionnaire that prompts you to think about additional stories, characteristics, and moments. You complete this at your own pace and return it when you're ready.
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4. Writing
Using everything you've shared, I write the eulogy. I structure it so it flows logically while still feeling personal and heartfelt. I aim for a length that works well when read aloud – typically 800-1200 words, which takes about 5-8 minutes to deliver.
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5. Your approval
I send you the draft to review. You can request changes, additions, or adjustments to tone. We work together until it feels exactly right.
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6. Final version
You receive the finished eulogy, beautifully formatted and ready for the funeral.
Why work with a professional
You might wonder whether it's better to write the eulogy yourself or work with someone like me. Here's what I offer:
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Structure and flow
I know how to shape memories and stories into a narrative that makes sense and moves people. I can see the thread that connects different parts of someone's life.
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Objectivity
When you're grieving, it's hard to see clearly. I can help identify what's most important to include and what might be left out.
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Writing experience
I'm practiced at finding the right words and the right tone. I know how to balance humour with sadness, how to be specific without being too detailed, and how to end on a note that feels complete.
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Emotional buffer
Sometimes families find that working with someone else on the eulogy takes some of the emotional weight off their shoulders. You provide the memories; I provide the structure.
Delivery options
Once the eulogy is written, you have options for how it's delivered:
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You deliver it yourself
Many families find that reading the eulogy themselves is meaningful, even though it's difficult. If you choose this route, I can offer tips on managing your emotions and presenting clearly.
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Someone else reads it
You might ask a family member, friend, or the funeral celebrant conducting the ceremony to deliver the eulogy on your behalf.
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I deliver it
If you've also booked me for the full funeral ceremony, I can incorporate the eulogy into the service and deliver it for you.
What makes a good eulogy
Through my experience, I've learned what makes a eulogy truly moving:
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Specificity
Rather than general statements ("she was kind"), specific examples and stories that show their character in action.
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Balance
Acknowledging both the wonderful and the difficult, the public achievements and the private quirks.
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Authenticity
Sounding like it's genuinely about this person, not a template that could apply to anyone.
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Structure
A clear beginning, middle and end that takes people on a journey through the person's life.
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Appropriate length
Long enough to do justice to their story but not so long that attention wanders.
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Emotion with control
Moving and heartfelt, but structured enough that it can be delivered without completely breaking down.
Questions about eulogy writing
How long does the process take?
From our initial meeting to receiving the final eulogy typically takes 5-7 days, though I can work faster if needed for urgent situations.